A small tug on the thread of regret can unravel a whole garment. While lying in bed on a lazy, yet thoughtful, Sunday I began to think about my regrets. Inevitably, my Sunday morning of tranquillity turned into a morning of  disappointments. The duvet that enveloped me so warmly now began to choke me. I was at a loss.

Gaining, losing and winning.  Can a winner be winning all his life?  Is a straight win a true win?  Or, in the dog eat dog world that we live in, do we ultimately need to lose before we can collect our winnings?  Self – examination can be a terrible thing, but at times it can soften edges that were once too sharp to touch.

There are two things that go with a drunken person: kebabs and confessions.  A drunk friend recently confessed to me that she was nearly unfaithful to her boyfriend.  To this, like all good friends, I made an attempt to justify her lustful thoughts. I made a gallant attempt to make sense of madness.  It became clear to me that almost being unfaithful had actually saved her relationship.  It’s only now, when putting her relationship at risk by by almost tasting forbidden fruit, she had realised that the fruit that she had been picking was already sweet enough.  So now, ironically, the boyfriend is even more appreciated, the relationship more solid.  It seems to pay to have slippery hands, where all that is good is held in a tight but oily grip.  This combination of loss/gain is a sure win. Is there any sense of going out with the best person and not knowing it?  It doesn’t matter where you are if you are unaware of it.

Mistakes and losses are under-rated.  After all, something’s only good because you know that something else is bad. It’s true, gambling and running risks leaves you open and vulnerable, and vulnerability brings along it’s own risks. But sometimes it can re-centre you.

That Sunday morning I realised something; winning, without the losing and gaining, is an illusion - it’s fool’s gold.  And losing is nothing but an attitude.  In a world where winning is a combination of losing and gaining: I declare us all winners!  Dorothy had to lose Toto, an apple had to be bitten, and my friend had to almost lose her boyfriend – just for the night.  Sometimes losing, and the sadness that comes with it can be beautiful; its profoundness can be felt forever.  And sometimes, winnings without the gains, can be seen as being fleeting moments in time, blink and they’re gone forever……..